Doctor's Orders

So this summer I had planned to keep my little monkey home from daycare at least 2-3 days a week.  We have to pay for daycare all summer to hold her spot and I thought that would be a great compromise - a few days for some "me time" and a few for "mommy and J time."

This plan hit some snafus (sp?) - First, Dr's orders say I'm not allowed to lift her - more on that in another post. And well...I guess there is no other real reason.  But try to do something fun and productive with your toddler without lifting them all day and let me know how that goes...So my plan got altered a bit.

But Dr.'s orders or not, I still have the summer off and I still desperately want to spend some quality time with my adorable daughter.  So when my neighborhood girlfriends suggested a beach day (or really Beach Morning) I was all in.  We hit the road around 9:00 to get to a great beach (short walk from the parking lot, family friendly, and not too far away). The day was amazing...really amazing. J loved the ocean, loved the sand, loved the snacks, and hanging out with her buddies.

Thanks to Katy for the pic!

It reminded me how  much I miss being a stay at home mom.  I loved spending the whole day with her and just enjoying her company and the company of all my friends here.  We left the beach around noon with plans to nap her when we got home.

And then it happened...J napped in the car (20 minutes) which as any SAHM would tell you - is a nightmare.  Yes, it's great that she closed her eyes for a bit, but I was driving while she napped, which meant that I got zero downtime.  I tried to transfer her into her bed and for about 10 minutes I was fooled into thinking that maybe the transfer actually worked.  It didn't.

And now here we are around 4:00 and this working mommy turned SAHM for a day is exhausted and the toddler is running around like a maniac.

So now...I'm looking forward to dropping her off at daycare tomorrow morning - after all, it is "Dr.'s orders."

Playdates After Hours

In college, the parties that happened after the bars closed and after the "regular" parties were called After Hours.  I think I may have majored in After Hours in college...but that's a story for another time.

These days I'm in a very weird place.  I'm now a 'working mom'.  Going back to work had me really nervous about how I would keep in touch with all my mom-friends (who aren't just mom-friends anymore, but just friends).  But here was the unexpected surprise, I still get to see my Stay at Home Mom friends (most of them are still at home, at least part time). And I guess I have the kids to thank for that.

In the early days of being home, the kiddies were all napping twice a day - morning and afternoon, so our playdates were usually lunch dates.  And they were great, we got to sit and chit chat and eat lunch while the kids played around us.  This was before they were all walking  running around.  When we could actually sit and chill and lament about parenthood and our sex lives.  Then the playdates kind of went away. The kids were all napping at different times, our classes were scattered, and it was hard to find a day and time that worked for us. And now, they seem to be back in action, and I couldn't be happier about it.  First of all, they're happening after the kids' naptimes which is usually anywhere from 12-3.  So the playdates are around 3:30/4:00 which mean my school teacher self gets to make it to them!

And now, they've gotten easier - the kids play with the toys and each other (as much as toddlers do) and except for the occassional "fight" over a toy, we get to hang out and chat about our kids, our husbands, and all the other crap going on in our lives. 
I'm feeling lucky.  Lucky to have met a group of women who love my kid.  A group of women who still include me even though I'm a "working mom" now.  A group of women who ask me how school is when I show up at the play date.  A group of women who have been with me through a whole lot of sh**. 

It's nice to be back in the playdate circle.

Now I just have to figure out how to get my act together and host one....hmmm maybe Veteran's Day or some other day when I have off....

Guest Post: Evolution of the Playgroup

I can't begin to tell you how excited I am about this guest post from Harm over at Baby To Go.  I've been asking her to post for me for a long time now, and she finally stopped traveling for long enough to write something for me.  She's out of her usual comfort zone (traveling with baby/toddler in tow) and writing about us...not her and I (although we're in here) us as in moms and our relationships with each other.

I would call Harm one of my best mommy friends, but in truth she's just one of my best friends.  I am lucky to have met her and so happy that our kids are growing up together.  She is a big reason why I am not looking forward to going back to work.  Okay, enough about my love for her - check out what she has to say about our playgroups and leave her some comments!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Parallel Play: The evolution of the playgroup

When my son was 5 weeks old, I ventured out to a new mom meet-up in our neighborhood. I was looking for some adults to talk to, and something to do. I never though I would meet so many great friends, with kids around the same age as C. That is how I met Melissa & Jenna.

Out of this weekly meet-up grew our little playgroup. We would meet weekly, at a rotating hostess’ apartment. The hostess would provide lunch, and we would sit around and chat while our babies lay on blankets and stared at each other. These playdates would last for 3 or 4 hours. Kids would nap if they were tired. They would eat, maybe play with some new toys… who knew how blissful this really was?

C dressed up for his 1st play date, June '09

Last fall we began to take classes together and in good weather, groups went for long walks in the neighborhood or out to lunch. As winter turned to spring, our group became a little more informal, meeting mainly at the local playgrounds and sometimes the park for a picnic. Enjoying the emerging nice weather after the snowy winter months.


But about three months ago, when my son started walking, any attempt to “socialize” with another mom & child, became not so fun. Picture me chasing after my son, with broken bits of adult conversation in between. In the past few months, play dates have been on hiatus, and maybe it’s just the warmer weather, but at the same time, now that the children are rambunctious toddlers, it’s hard to have 5 or 6 (or more!) kids running around an apartment. Meeting another mom for a stroll, or coffee (so fun and easy when they are little infants) is impossible. Even a trip to the zoo or children’s museum, each mom is running after their lil’one… usually in opposite directions!

There is also the nap factor. Most of the kids we know are in the 16-20 month range. And their naps are at different times, different lengths. Some kids have to be home to nap, some kids are more flexible with their nap schedules. So it makes even finding a time of day to get together quite tough.


So even though I “interact” with other moms (I haven’t morphed into a hermit, and btw, my kid has no nap schedule) I miss my mommy-friends and our get-togethers. I guess with everything baby-related, this is just a phase. You probably could coin it the parallel play phase. And I’m talking about the parents here, not the kids. As the kids grow, and become more self-sufficient, I’m hoping the play dates will evolve to where we moms can sit back on the couch, have a glass of vino, laugh about our husbands, while the kids play together.


At what age does that happen?