Friday, May 7, 2010

Parenting Styles

People talk about different parenting styles all the time. Most of the time you're comparing yourself to your friends or people you know.  But I think it's even more obvious between my husband and I.  Luckily, we agree on the real core issues on how we're going to raise our child(ren) - you know, values and stuff...but on some everyday things...we just differ.

Case(s) in point:
* Jenna goes to sleep around 7 each night - I poke my head in once a little after I stop hearing her over the monitor and I'm done - no more checking for me.  However, hubby comes home (after she's sleeping) and checks on her, checks on her after he showers, and does at least one more check before we go to bed.  (And those are just the times he tells me about!) And when I say "check" I mean he goes in and places his hand on her belly to check for breathing...

* Over a recent weekend, Jenna went down for her morning nap - which usually lasts about an hour - after an hour and a half - I'm saying to him "this is great" and he goes to her door and she's sort of zoning out but sitting up.  He tells me she's up and I say - well she'll let us know when she wants us....I feel like if she's just chilling in her crib, why should we take her out...he then asks me if this is "what I do" - And I explain to him, that I never know exactly what time she wakes from her nap because I do not obsessively check on her...Well he kept checking until she finally saw him and stood up for him to get her...

* I admit it, I "watch" Jenna by ear sometimes.  Meaning, I can be in the living room and I will listen for what room she is in and if I feel like she's gone to far or gets too quiet, I call her back in.  If she doesn't respond, I obviously go and find her.  (Please note - we live in an apartment -she's never too far) Hubby follows her - into every room.  If she walks out, so does he.  He makes fun of me, I make fun of him....different styles...

He claims I can be a little more "hands off" (his words, not mine) because I'm home with her and I "know her better" (again, his words), not sure that I agree with this or not.  But either way I guess it's good that we both do what's comfortable for us and I assume Jenna will come to expect those roles from us and probably use them against us at some point (god I'm scared of her teenage years!)


  1. It looks like you and I have very similar parenting styles! I am probably going to have to change some things when I move next month into a house, but for the time being, watching him by ear works perfectly! :)

  2. My husband was the same way with our first daughter. I used to check on her and I would just look to see that she was breathing. He would actually poke her so that she moved. I kept telling him it wasn't necessary, especially since it woke her up half the time. It really drove me nuts when he would also pick her up to kiss her before he left for work in the morning. As soon as he closed the front door she would wake up. Agh!

    I found you through the D-List and I'm now a follower!

  3. "watching" by ear is working for now...we'll see how it goes once she gets taller and can reach more!

    Michele - yay d-listers!! welcome aboard!