Good Recovery

Disappointment...last week was the first time I felt this emotion about my daughter. It was unwarranted and actually really immature and stupid of me to feel this way in the situation...but still...it was there.

J is an extremely outgoing little girl.  She likes to put on "shows" with her cousin during family dinners and is usually the "loudest" singer in her class shows.  But last week, something was different.  We had a small stepping up program from her class - they were to perform 3 or 4 songs and just look adorable.  I knew every word to these songs because that's pretty much all she would sing around the house for weeks.  She knew these songs. I was so excited to see her perform with her friends.

And then the performance came - lots and lots of people filled her classroom (more than are typically there for performance) - I made Mike leave work and come because she's usually such a "star" at these things.  First song...great - in Chinese nonetheless! Then the kids started melting down and then J melted down.  And then I f**ed up.  She came running to me with tears and instead of saying "don't worry about it - you're doing great." I said something along the lines of "Look at all your friends singing. Why aren't you up there with them?" Her tears kept coming. She stayed on my lap for the remainder of the show. And I was disappointed. Not my best parenting moment that's for sure.

After it ended, Mike (the better parent in this situation) told her how proud he was of her and how great she did.  And she smiled. I looked at him like he was crazy and then he and my friend pulled me aside and told me (in not such nice words) that I was the crazy one and I should get myself in check. She is three years old. He was right. I was wrong.

Yesterday was her ballet recital.  Mike couldn't come so I was going to be the only parent there, so I knew I had to be better. And I was nervous for her.  Nervous that she would get too scared to perform.  But this time, I was confident that I would be proud of her no matter what.  And of course, since I was so worried, she gave her best performance. She danced beautifully. Followed the teacher's every instruction. From plies to first position to pointed toes.  She was a perfect, graceful ballerina.  And I teared up with pride as I watched her.  And this time I told her over and over how great she did and how proud I am of her.

I'm hoping that my little bout with disappointment doesn't rear it's ugly head again...well, at least until she does dumb teenage things.

We Picked 'Em!

As a teacher, one of the things I always find myself discussing with parents is the importance of giving children "experiences." So many of my student don't do anything over the summer...some don't do anything on the weekends either.  One of the things I promised to do as a parent was to give my little monkey as many  experiences as possible.  Whether it's going to the local petting zoo or a street fair or the beach, we really make it a priority to do something with her as often as possible.

This weekend, our 'something' was berry picking.  We went last year and it was so good that we decided to make it an annual adventure.  We headed out to Mattituck, Long Island to Patty's Berries and Bunches and got to pick our fill of blueberries and raspberries (blackberries aren't ready until August, so we may have to take another trip).  Watching J run through the blueberry bushes with this huge smile was worth the hour and a half trip.

 We told her to only pick the ones that are blue and fat and she basically spent the morning picking the best ones and shoving them in her mouth.  I can honestly say she loved being there, picking the most delicious berries you've ever tasted, seeing bugs and bees at work, and running around the farm.

Once our baskets were full, we headed across the street to Harbes Farm and Vineyard for lunch, animals, farm fresh veggies, and wine tasting (for daddy and grandma - I was the designated driver).

What a great experience for J...and for us.


Now I'm busy looking for recipes with fresh blueberries...muffins....tarts....hmmm.